I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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