And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Randomize
