thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
