wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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