I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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