Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
