You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
