The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
