drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
