Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Randomize
