I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
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