And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
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