I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
