marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Randomize
