Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
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