First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize
