great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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