yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
