She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
even my farts smell like vagina
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
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