Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
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