it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize