Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
