Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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