i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
