let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize