Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
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