I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
