in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Cover your peen. We're going out.
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