It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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