so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
