It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
