the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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