That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
