I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
