The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Randomize
