like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
