Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Randomize
