Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
