he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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