so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize