Yo dont text me then not text me
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Randomize
