shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
You need Xanax blowdarts
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
