no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Randomize
