This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
