i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
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