Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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