I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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