hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Randomize
