i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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