I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Randomize
