Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
he shaved USA in his pubs
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I think a kid would responsible me up
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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